Goodbye and Thank you

My grandmother, Harriet, died tonight. Physically, her body gave out. Mentally she has been missing for years now.
I remember the smell of my grandma and grandpa's car when they would pick me up from school. There was always a pillow and a box of tissues in the backseat with me. A list of all the counties, with license plate numbers, was under the visor. The smooth ride in their big "grandpa car" was memorable as well.
My grandma had a wonderful smile and warm eyes, you know the type that draw people in because she was kind and caring. Their house was comfortable, grandpa used to have the TV on really loud and grandma and I would be in the kitchen baking or drawing on dishcloths. I think she knew I wasn't artistic, but dang she'd encourage and cheer me on. She was very talented and offered me opportunities to be creative. She was a teacher by profession and by nature I believe.
Sunday night I visited her with my sister and I remember thinking what a great mother she must have been too because of the father I have. In the past few years she would recognize us less and blankly respond to our hugs and squeezes. Selfishly, I didn't want to see her that way. But she's not only my grandmother, she's my dad's mom. I think of the memories he's shared with me about his childhood and about the examples she set for my dad and it makes me sad for him. Her passing is a blessing...but she's gone now, and that's painful.
Tonight I witnessed some of her last breaths...like she was there to witness some of my first. She cared for me and loved me in a way only a grandma could. How lucky I was/am to have her influence on my life. "Hoddy" impacted many lives and all who knew her understood her warmth and love for people. I'm sad for those that only knew her in these past few years because they never got to experience her as a whole.

Thank you grandma for your love and guidance. Grandpa has been waiting a long time for you.

Grandma's Obituary
a pic from last Christmas